A Gift Buying Guide

I do no own this comic. I got it from here: http://www.cartoonstock.com/directory/b/buying_flowers_gifts.asp

So it was my boyfriend’s birthday.  For the last three or four gift giving events, I’ve managed to secure some decent gifts (sometimes with the help of friends). Well, this time I was out of awesome gift options. He has EVERYTHING. Ok, not everything, but he’s repeatedly answered my queries of “what do you want” with “nothing”.

I like to think that I’m not alone with how frustrating that is as an answer (though I have to admit, I do it all the time). So I did what everyone does (or at least, what I think everyone does…), I went to the trusty interwebs for some help.

It didn’t help.

All of the lists out there are definitely screwed in the head. One list told me to buy him a plane. Seriously people, a plane? A PLANE?! Or golf clubs. Don’t get me started on this. Nevermind, I’m already there – the only time you should buy your significant other golf clubs is A) if you already know what make, model, material and height they want or B) if they’ve never golfed before. Trust me. Serious golfers pick their own clubs. There’s a whole process involved that you don’t want to mess with. How do I know this? My dad’s a golfer. I’ve been buying him golf stuff for years. If you’re buying for a golfer give me a shout, I’ll make some suggestions that don’t involve pricey clubs they’ll return.

Anyway, back to the topic at hand – how to buy a gift for your significant other.

If you’re like me (you probably aren’t but just go with me here) you want the gift to be awesome (why buy it if it isn’t?). Granted my boyfriend already has my heart (aww cheeese) and that’s the most awesome gift ever, but I gave that to him two years ago. So now I’m wondering – how well do I really know him if I can’t think of a good gift? He pointed out to me (yes, I told him all these thoughts, I suck at keeping secrets) that I know him very well, so there’s one stress of my chest. (oops, sidetracked again)

Onto the list!

These are my three tips on how to find a great gift… even if it’s just amusing rather than sensational.

1) Ask the person what they want

Do this sporatically, when they least expect it, until you get an answer you can roll with. Or until they sound so annoyed they might spit (has anyone actually spit when they’re that annoyed? Anyone?)

This is good because… sometimes they’ll give you the nothing answer, sometimes they’ll throw you a bone and sometimes they’ll say something so random you can actually work with it (trust me I’ve done it. It’s a great “gag” gift!)

2) Check out the gift giving suggestions online

But DO NOT take them too seriously. They really are just marketing ploys by random companies. Also, some of that stuff is crazy expensive. Half of it propably will just make you laugh.

This is good because… it gives you an idea of all the random stuff that’s out there, which then leads to ideas of what to get (ie. the plane could become a miniature model plane kit… giant leap, but the idea is there). If you have a good relationship with the recipient, read some of the options out, test the waters. An added bonus – you get to laugh. (really? A porcelain bowl shaped like a swan is on the top 100 gifts for guys 30 +… really?) (seriously, it is)

3) Go shopping

Pretend you need to buy something then visit every store known to mankind. Start with the stores that appeal to both of you and then let your recipient lead the way. Be coy about it though. If they keep asking what you need, in an increasingly annoyed voice, and all you do is mumble incoherently and then walk away quickly, you’re doing it wrong.

This works because… they will naturally gravitate towards crap they’re interested in. And you get to spend money on yourself. That’s a win win!

Final Note

So those are my three tips. And remember, if all else fails, there’s always gift certificates. If s/he owns an apple prooduct, they always need itunes money. If s/he loves food, they could always use grocery money (yes, they have gift certificates for grocery stores). Also a good back up plan? Alcohol. (but only if they drink… and this way, you get to drink too!)

So now you know my gift finding tricks. Use them well, my students. And if you get in trouble, you didn’t hear this from me.

If you have any good tips, I’m all ears! I can put them to good use at Christmas time.